Live in the Deep End

One of my favorite things to do growing up was swim to the bottom of my grandma’s pool and lie on the floor of the deep end, watching my air bubbles float up to the sunny, glassy surface. Sometimes my heart aches for those days, so full of simplicity where it was always summer and it was all wet hair and wet towels and neon bathing suites and the smell of chlorine and sunblock that left you white, when all I wanted out of life was to be a mermaid. It’s true. You can ask my mother. I wanted to have a fin instead of legs and be Ariel and live in the ocean and have my best friend be a talking fish.

There’s this cheesy overused quote, from Anais Nin: “I must be a mermaid. I have no fear of depths, and a great fear of shallow living.” And I hate to say it, because I strive to be as far from basic as possible, but I can’t help it: this quote is my life. I fear living a life in the shallow end, because the shallow end is predictability. The shallow end is comfort. The shallow end is reclusive. The shallow end is fearful. The shallow end is being lukewarm.

But the deep end I crave. I want the uncertainty, the excitement, the transparency, the vulnerability, the courage, the total reliance on God that comes with being real with people and living a life of substance, of abundance, full of Jesus.

I think this is how we’re supposed to live, lives full and brimming with Jesus. I mean He came and died and rose again so that we may have full and abundant lives, lives spent in the deep end instead of the shallow end. But life without fully embracing your identify, and the work on the Cross, and living a life that doesn’t reflect Jesus that is shallow and meaningless. And a life in the shallow end adds up to nothing. It’s chaff in the wind, people.

So I won’t ever be a mermaid, but I can at least strive to live life and have it abundantly, deeply, so full of Jesus and over flowing with Him.


Thoughts, questions, concerns? Tell me what you think! Let’s discuss! Leave a comment below. Get a little heated. Agree. Disagree. Throw your opinion out there. Hey, maybe I’m wrong. Maybe I’m right. It doesn’t really matter, it’s my opinion anyway. I’m just glad you decided to join the conversation.